Even the most hard hearted of people probably secretly enjoy the occasional romantic movie. They offer us a chance to break out the Kleenex, have a good cry and ogle the ridiculously attractive lead characters.
Sure, there is nothing wrong with the occasional romantic movie but the truth here is romantic movies tend to be nothing more than mindless and unrealistic filler for the soul. This of course makes such movies unrealistic to real life and has many of us wandering around in search of love life that probably will only exist if you are the lucky hooker picked up by Huge Grant.
Despite their unrealistic to life nature there are plenty of things about love and romance we all assume to be true – thanks to the movies.
1 – Larger Lady’s Seldom Have a Serious Romantic Relationship
When it comes to women in romantic movies it is easy to see that Hollywood has a tendency to not use women who are, shall we say petite. This is most likely because larger women do not fit in with what the media or what society believes is attractive. If you think about it, with the exception of Bridget Jones’s Diary and Mike and Molly, there are very few movies or television shows that use a larger lady in the title role. Even the few examples of bigger women in a title role usually results in the audience being encouraged to laugh at the funny chubby lady as she struggles to lose weight and can never fasten her jeans.
Yes, if romantic movies are anything to go by the larger ladies of the world appear to have no chance of ever experiencing a sickly beautiful Hollywood romance. Hollywood has spoken and it really does seem that for larger ladies your love life will be nothing more than a series of embarrassing mishaps that occur because you are a little overweight.
2 – Every Man A Woman Falls in Love With Will Have Six Pack Abs
It is not just the women in romantic movies who must be thin, tall and beautiful; the men must also follow that trend. Men, especially men who are cast in a title role, must be athletic and chiselled types who make teenage girls dribble with excitement. This is the very reason many teenage girls grow up believing that every man they meet must look like this and nothing else is acceptable. This portrayal is partially responsible for building shallow attitudes where only attractive people are worthy of attracting other people because all that matters in life is the way a person looks.
3 – Men Always Gladly Sacrifice Themselves Even For Girls They Have just Met
This is the sort of thing that is brilliantly explained by using the case of Jack Dawson in the movie Titanic. The scene at the end where Jack freezes himself to death in order to save Rose, the woman he only just met. Not only is this scene cheesy as hell there is the annoying fact that Rose makes no effort to help him out and there certainly appears to be enough room for two on that floating door. This scene wonderfully demonstrates that Hollywood quite obviously believes it is not enough to just save a girl from drowning you must also give your life needlessly in the process as well.
4 – Hate and Love Are Commonly Confused
One of the most common clichés that we see in romantic movies is when the two main characters hate each other in the beginning. By the end of the movie the same two characters have realised that they never actually hated each other but rather loved each other. We see this cliché in an endless number of movies such as The Proposal, how to Lose a Guy in 10 Days, 10 Things I Hate About You, The Ugly Truth, What Happens in Vegas, It’s a Boy Thing, and A Walk to Remember.
What are we to learn from this Hollywood cliché? If you want to know who you will fall in love with and spend the rest of your life all you need to do is look for the person you hate the most.
5 – Career Women Are Kidding Themselves
Think about movies such as The Proposal and The Ugly Truth. Both movies have a strong minded female character in the lead role and both women are career driven with an intense desire to make it in the world of corporate America. Just like everything else in life Hollywood has its very own opinion on the subject of career orientated women. According to Hollywood women who are actively pursuing any kind of career are just kidding themselves because what they really desire more than anything else is to get married and pop out a few kids.
To add insult to injury in this matter Hollywood isn’t finished by just suggesting career women are kidding themselves. Hollywood also goes all in by suggesting that it takes a man to tame the wild beast of a career woman. He needs to whip out his magical wild beast taming penis and bring her back down to earth. What Hollywood is really saying is that wanting a career, being intelligent and working hard are unattractive traits in a woman, and she must learn that all she really needs and wants is a man. Being career minded and a bitch come hand in hand too, it’s definitely not possible for an intelligent career minded woman to be nice as well.
6 – Looks Are The Most Important Thing
The guy gets the hot girl is a convention in a lot of films, but notice the emphasis on hot. Of course it’s so much more important that he gets the physically attractive girl over a girl who is nice, kind and has stuff in common with him. Guys, even if she’s a total bitch or completely boring, as long as she’s hot it’s a score. Don’t even worry about your long term happiness or even your short term happiness because hotness and happiness come hand in hand and you will always be happy so long as you’ve got the hot girl. Plenty of hot girls are nice and kind too, don’t get me wrong, but the emphasis is always on the fact that she needs to be hot as opposed to the guy simply gets the nice girl who likes him and he likes back.
Let’s look at this the other way around too; when the focus of the film is on the girl and not the guy, it’s all about whether or not she gets the hot guy. The kind, slightly less attractive (by the media’s standards anyway) guy who’s always nice to the girl and clearly likes her will only ever be just a friend because it’s oh so important that she ends up with the hot guy.
7 – Romance is Exclusively Heterosexual
The vast majority of mainstream romance is exclusively heterosexual and homosexual romance is pretty much non-existent in the media. Unless you’re a man and a woman, romance won’t happen. If it does, it’s not considered cute or nice or exciting or something to celebrate, it’s something that should be censored and hidden away. You shouldn’t hold hands in public or kiss in public or do anything to suggest that you and the person walking next to you are anything more than friends. We all know that romance is lovely in any form, and we all know that love is love no matter who loves who and no matter their gender, and yet romantic movies and the media in general are quick to teach that romance and love is exclusively heterosexual.